2016 One Word: Intentional
I returned this past Saturday after spending one week in Taiwan and experienced two of the most emotionally difficult days of my adult life, as well as spending Christmas on a 14.5 hour flight and New Years in a hotel room with my son sleeping beside me.
#1:
Meeting my new son (Edward- aged 12), sitting in court and committing to be his legal guardian and then having to say goodbye for two or so more months before he joins our family.
#2:
Then visiting a women's prison a mere 15 minutes away from our hotel with my middle son to see his birth mother. Watching tears stream down first her face, and then his - and having to leave that tiny bleak room, knowing that he may never see her again.
It wasn't until Sunday morning when we were taking down our Christmas tree, when my eldest adopted son (James-now aged 18) responded to my almost rhetorical question with a nugget of wisdom I needed to hear again.
I nonchalantly asked: "how come it takes so much longer to put this tree up than to take it down?", to which he replied, "it's easier to destroy than to create!".
This simple statement hit me and took me back in time to that busy train station hugging my new son then walking away, - and to that prison room, hugging a small, emotionally frail women and walking away.
SO many people have asked me why we did the prison visit - why submit my son to that trauma? Well, it was his choice, his wish. Who am I to deny him that? I believe we created a memory and moment in time that will allow healing and closure as he enters his teenage years. I told her that I was honored to meet her and that she should not be embarrassed (as she said she was) to meet me like this - in this condition. I chose to speak about life and love and joy and create a moment of gratitude for both of them.
As we enter a new year (year of the Monkey on the Chinese Calendar) - I choose 'intentional' as my #ONEword. I plan to be intentional with my time, my energy, my word choice and things I choose to do.
Wishing you all clarity as you select your #oneword to make an impact on your life and those around you this New Year!
#1:
Meeting my new son (Edward- aged 12), sitting in court and committing to be his legal guardian and then having to say goodbye for two or so more months before he joins our family.
#2:
Then visiting a women's prison a mere 15 minutes away from our hotel with my middle son to see his birth mother. Watching tears stream down first her face, and then his - and having to leave that tiny bleak room, knowing that he may never see her again.
It wasn't until Sunday morning when we were taking down our Christmas tree, when my eldest adopted son (James-now aged 18) responded to my almost rhetorical question with a nugget of wisdom I needed to hear again.
I nonchalantly asked: "how come it takes so much longer to put this tree up than to take it down?", to which he replied, "it's easier to destroy than to create!".
BOOM!
This simple statement hit me and took me back in time to that busy train station hugging my new son then walking away, - and to that prison room, hugging a small, emotionally frail women and walking away.
We destroy without much thought or effort.
It takes time to build, to create, to make lasting impact.
SO many people have asked me why we did the prison visit - why submit my son to that trauma? Well, it was his choice, his wish. Who am I to deny him that? I believe we created a memory and moment in time that will allow healing and closure as he enters his teenage years. I told her that I was honored to meet her and that she should not be embarrassed (as she said she was) to meet me like this - in this condition. I chose to speak about life and love and joy and create a moment of gratitude for both of them.
As we enter a new year (year of the Monkey on the Chinese Calendar) - I choose 'intentional' as my #ONEword. I plan to be intentional with my time, my energy, my word choice and things I choose to do.
Wishing you all clarity as you select your #oneword to make an impact on your life and those around you this New Year!
Geniene, just drop the mic because this post hit the mark about the importance of being intentional builders of all things good.
ReplyDeleteHaha Joy - that made me laugh :) Thank you!
DeleteHaha Joy - that made me laugh :) Thank you!
DeleteOne day I'll be able to say that I know this world renowned author! Who you are as a mom and the experiences you intentionally have with your children is simply amazing- I would love to read your memoir!
ReplyDeleteToo kind Sheilah!!
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