Masters of disguise

This morning as I sit inside our bus at the campground, I'm not quite ready to face the day. I'm nursing my second cup of coffee and have already shoo'd my husband off, who was being unusually perky.  Instead of joining the breakfast crew, I needed time for me. And so I reflect, and write.....and share with you.

I'll admit that some mornings I do believe that by applying a little more makeup as I ready myself for the work day, I'll be able to cover up my inner angst. I'm not saying that every day I have makeup on equates to having a bad day. I have however tried to 'paint the perfect face' on days I was feeling, well far from OK.

I've said before, I'm just a broken adult making each day as best as I can, doing the best I can.

I had a friend who was obnoxiously loud. She knew as well as I (and others that tried to coach her), that it was her way of overcompensating for her lack of confidence and immature social skills. She hid from doing the work ( the tough soul searching - let's be better work) and instead covered up with an alter ego that rubbed just about everyone the wrong way.

Kids don't mask anything until they are taught how to. When they're young they tell it like it is!  Just yesterday my youngest stomped downstairs in his pj's ( red flag - usually dressed) and stomped around muttering (normal). I waited a while before asking what was wrong. It was clear as day that something had him fired up. I was right and we resolved the issue.

Adults tend to forget how easy it was to to just say what was on our minds or speak the truth, we have learned to filter our responses as we should but by doing so have learned the needed art of speaking our own truths. We think it's quaint and showcase how "kids say the darnedest things". No, kids speak the truth as they see it, until they learn that society doesn't want to hear the truth. We send such mixed messages into the world, no wonder our youth are crying out and making reckless choices.....and are dying. The news media is flooded with messages and images of negativity and our own social media streams contain the only the best of us (always happy, always smiling, always celebrating achievements and success). Do I want to air my dirty laundry on Facebook -no. Should we filter our messages to the public?, well sure - probably. But inbetween the pictures I posted  of cleaning and boarding our bus for this camping trip, I'm pretty sure I won "mother of the year" (read sarcasm here) for losing my temper/showing less kindness than I should have etc etc. 
So where is the happy medium?

How do we achieve, maintain and teach balance?

I bring this all up this Memorial Day weekend as I reflect on some brave folks, who are putting themselves on the line to save others. Selflessness in the face of fear. Today a friend and his friends will speak before hundreds of youth (and on- air to hopefully millions). Their messages will inspire and give hope. If I had the opportunity to speak with them, I'd say this:

Stop hiding! Be you - be real.....flawed and imperfect. Recognize your brokenness and work each day to make yourself better. Expose your cracks so that you can heal them. You don't cover up a wound with Band-Aids forever, because  your skin need to breath and toughen up, and scab over. Yes, your scars might be visible, but they don't show to the world as signs of weakness.
You'll never know who you really are if you keep pretending to be someone else. That robs yourself of joy and others from knowing the real you.  Life is too short to live with any kind of mask on.

Guess what? We all need to be doing this inner work every day. So you're not alone. Look around you.... you could reach out right now and find someone in the same boat as you. Someone who can identify with your struggle/need and help you in this life journey together. Asking for support is the best thing you can do as you learn who you are, and figure out what you need in life. 

You'll have plenty of time to become a master of something worthy of you and your passions. But don't, I BEG YOU....don't become a master of disguise.